MARRIAGE

So as I sit here on my computer in another country far away from my comfort zone and family.  These last few days have been very trying on my marriage. I found out a couple of things from my daughter about my husband which took me by surprise they were hurtful to know and I hate my daughter had to find out which is taking an effect on her views about BLACK men and their character.  YES he has been conversating online with other women while I've been away I can only pray that that's all he's been doing and not actually hanging out with them and among other things with them.  I know I signed up for this marriage thing but I never would have thought the man that I gave myself to in this kind of commitment would betray me the way he has. So now I'm left with do I want to continue this marriage and pray that he has left the online nonsense alone or do I just walk away never to look back. One can only pray.  I would love for my marriage to work because I didn't sign on for a one year contract this was suppose to be a life time commitment but I guess everyone doesn't see it like that.  I always thought if someone cheated on me I would just walk away never to look back but he is my husband and not my boyfriend so this makes my decision far more harder to do.  I don't want to set the wrong example for my girls but I also don't want to give up on him because he has so much potential to be the man that I married and more. He thinks that he's not cut out for marriage but who is I have my flaws where I have been doing things for so long my way that it was hard for me to try his way but I did and I came to love his way.  I fought tooth and nail to not submit but I eventually did because I was the one saying I wanted out because I was scared of change and he was the one saying we had to work and fight for our marriage now he's the one doing things I would never have thought he would do.  So how do I bounce back from this kind of betrayal. 

BLACK LOVE

So as I sit here just going through photos of my friends and family I think so many things like there isn't enough positive being said about Black people and how we love and can we love.  Here are some beautiful pics of my friends and family thats show us that we can and we do love.  And we do good in marriage.

This one is my favorite it shows a mother and her son nothing but love in it's purist form too adorable.  They are my two cousin by the way.  The pic above this one is my friends brother so he's like my little brother and yes he use to act like one of my real brothers...BOTHERSOME....:)  and his new wife Marquetta now Mrs. Cozart my friend from high school even though we weren't really close in high school she was still nice to me so I wish her nothing but the best.  And above them are my other cousins they look soo very happy there is some many examples of beautiful black love like the one at the top under me and my husband are my two friends I consider my sisters with their husbands.  Everyone look simply beautiful.  I just felt like posting something for the outside world to look at and say WOW there is a such thing as LOVE in the BLack community...  

MISSING HOME

I can't wait for this weekend, we got some things planned, gonna beat some a&$ playin cards that nite, gonna have a barbecue with the fixings ribs and bake beans and potatoe salad, mmmmm I can't wait for Saturday and Sunday to get here. On Sunday, I cooking a home cooked dinner. Steak smothered in gravy and onions, homemade mac n cheese, mashed potatoes corn bread. I think I won't miss home as much as long as I get to cook on one them days atleast once a week. The people are lickin their lips ready for Sunday. It's gonna feel good to cook for someone...

PEOPLE

This how my day went:
First I got up at 0615 cause my roommate woke me up
Second took me a shower n brushed my teeth did my hair
Third went to work at 0815
by 0900 I was tired..but I had to go to Camp Bondsteel for business. I didn't want to go because I had a DOUCHE NOZZLE drivin me there, and all he wanted to do was play music that was Latin I don't have anything against that but I don't want to hear it for long periods of time its starts to drive me crazy. I didn't want to hear the person drivin either. He has a voice that makes you wanna choke him out. Went to what we call AMFAM (Army Family) at 1930. It was ok put out some much needed information bout the upcoming month. So, there is Airforce CPT and she thinks she's the S@#@.. but reality is she's not she always have to say something when no one is even talkin to her...That's one Airmen I could do without..I'm soooooo ready for her to leave on Sunday it's not gettin here fast enough....We were trying to get photos of this monthly meeting so we brought our own camera and wouldn't you know it she couldn't be out done so she brought hers out and started takin pics. I don't think she even knows she rude or maybe she doesn't care. Either way I would like to choke her out too....:) enough of talkin about her. I go pick up my passport in the mornin at the Embassy I'm so excited to have one...NOW the trips began Istanbul, Greece, and then London. I may bag out of the London trip to let my new friend spend time with her family alone and find a new place to visit but I have to come wit one. I really wanna got to Morocco I think I will that trip for my birthday in September. Well I'm tired I'll talk some more tomorrow. Goodnite

PART TWO OF THE BALKANS MOUNTAINS

So this is one of many mountains that I was talking about. Yes it has snow on it...BEAUTIFUL...I hope I get the chance to climb it while I'm here. I don't think I will learn the language of the people here it's a little difficult to speak. But I will try to remember thank you and your welcome in Albanin. Going on a trip to Macedonia again in June this time it will be better I get to stay longer than the last time I was there I had to go get my passport.

WAKING UP IN THE BALKANS (KOSOVO)

Woke up this morning no lights or internet and it was cold outside. But once I got started with a shower it warmed me up...so now my day starts with a waffle and washing clothes....But on a better note waking up here in the Balkans and for y'all that don't know what the Balkans are it's Kosovo, Serbia, Croatia, Macedonia, Albania, Bosnia those are the countries that make up the Balkans. And waking up seeing the mountains outside my window is awesome I'm so ready to climb them and take a helicoper ride...next weekend we're taking a trip off post to the local economy to do some shopping...it auto be fun. TTFN.

 

SOLDIERS SAFETY

So, I'm on yahoo jus lookin at whats new why was there another attack on a soldier outside of France he was stabbed in the throat. While I'm here I really don't like that we have to go off of post in our uniforms I wish we could put our civilians clothes when we venture off post makes me feel uncomfortable over here in my uniform. I haven't felt this way til now...I will be talking to our Command Sergeant Major tomorrow morning about the whole situation....Because now I don't think it will be jus foreign soldiers targeted will be all of us in uniform...